Sleepy in Singapore

I know it's been a while since I last wrote a post here. I frankly have no idea how some bloggers can be sooo disciplined in updating their blogs. I guess some of them received sponsorships and dough from advertisements to make it worth their while but anyways though lotsa things happened to me, I just don't have it in me to be rattling about it here.

I'm in Singapore now and have been since the 20th of August. Hmm... am I happy? Well.. no. I don't know, Singapore still has that same old stranggled effects on me. I still feel so suffocated here, I still don't feel the feeling of liberation.

I still get bored by typical endless conversations of shopping, clubs, latest brands and all those shallow and rather pointless topics. Yea it kinda annoy me at times that conversations here carry no substance nor enlightenment. Now, I'm not saying I'm such a brilliant conversationalist that keeps up to date with all the current affairs. I'M NOT. That's why it appalls me that even someone like me can get bored with all the supposed 'hot' conversation topics that apparently seem quite normal and acceptable here. (I don't wanna talk about things that interest me only to be listened to cos I do think conversation is a TWO way thing.)

I do read news, I do keep abreast of current issues, not so much of the WHOLE WORLD- that's way too depressing/heavy for me at times but mostly of Singapore. It surprises me that some young adults don't and they're still living in their own contented and selfish world, pretty much sheltered in a snow globe. I actually am glad to stay away from Singapore for a while - honestly I don't think I can grow as an individual here. I don't see how being here allows my mind to explore possibilities and challenge impossibilities, to actually be street smart and worldly.

In Istanbul I had the opportunity to socialize with so many different people from different nationalities. Truth be told, I barely have my own personal Turkish friends (language problem mostly plus the local men always tend to be more friendly than the women and I'm NOT interested to befriend Turkish men), most of my friends are fellow foreigners in Istanbul. I felt like I've stepped into another world from my 'snow globe'. I've met people who are younger than me but with such amazing life experiences from all over the world. They are so brainy and eloquent. Makes me feel that I've wasted too much of my youth NOT exploring the world and how it can really change a person's perspective. Sometimes I feel embarrassed to converse with these young people (well I'm not THAT old but hey they're years younger!)cos they seem soooo much more wordly and intelligent than me but at times I feel blessed to receive joy in their company and life stories.

I've 2 and half weeks more to Istanbul. Am I looking forward to it? YES and No. Yes cos it's good to be back there - I miss my friends, my life there and of course to start earning again. No cos mom will start bawling, tearing my heart out at the same time and the fact that winter greets me. News has it that winter in Istanbul this year will be THE WORST EVER IN THOUSAND YEARS. No kidding. Global warming. Our earth is really getting messed up just cos its inhabitants are simply nonchalent about preserving it. So yea, think winter this year's gonna kill me. Last winter was already crap as it is... it was my first winter and no it wasn't fun (except for the snowy bit hehe but hey it only snows few days in Istanbul). I was freezing my ass off, on top of that, cos I wanted to save on the electricity (DAMN EX!), I didn't switch on the main house heater thus being at home wasn't such a warm cozy affair as one would usually imagine. IT WAS HELL! I was shivering and wearing way tooo many clothings and my teeth was chattering with cold. Yup, good luck to me.

Gonna end this one now. Will try to write again tomorrow. Have a good one.



Love;
V